Investigation of a Mad Dog (lol)

[Deleted]

Shadow looks at Mason as she asks why he is there.

"What am I doing here?"

"That's what she asked for, genius!"

"I didn't ask you. I was just making sure that is the question I was asked."

"Oh, the boobie one. Good. That brooding one there is annoyingly depressing."

The Merc with the Mouth looks over at Poe before looking back at Mason.

"I was in the neighborhood and heard your sweet voice... Well... To be honest. The guy who is controlling me, this weird guy from Canada put me here. But I like my first answer, so I'll go with that."

Shadow looks over to the murdered body. His face crinkles up in disgust.

"Oh not one of these again. Why can't shifters choose a nicer animal?"

"We would be out of work if they did, numbnuts."

"Would you please shut up? Here is a cookie!"

Shadow pulls his mask down, shoving a triple fudge cookie in his mouth. He tries to continue talking, but is all muffled from the cookie in his mouth.

[Poe/Fide/Scrap]

Poe looks back an forth at the two with an unreadable gaze. 'Great... The crazy one,' he thinks, 'though I should probably thank him... He saved me from... From... From whatever the Hell I was about to do.'.  The former Brotherhood member looks at his shadowy counterpart before turning his attention back to Mason, who looks just as confused as he is inside. 'Just think I could have been home training if she hadn't come along,' he continues his inner dialogue, 'but damn she looks good when she's puzzled.'. He smacks himself in the forehead and then thinks 'They saw you do that idiot, but at least it got the thought out of your head. Still though makes you wonder what you can't see under that outfit.'. He smacks himself again for licking his lips at the thought and then tries to play it off as if he is reacting to the Merc with a Mouth.

"Well it's nice to see our Brother out of his comic induced coma..."

 The enigma turns his attention back to Mason.

"Can I shoot him now?"

Before the Crusader can answer he begins to dig at the burnt hair with one of his daggers. He pulls the small bit on the tip of the blade toward his nose.

"Someone has a very warm touch... It would seem a demon is also after our furry friend... Sithis salva nos, si primo invenit eum."

He turns his attention back to the other two.

"Sed si duo non desinebat animo tuo da-"

The Hunter clears his throat and returns to his monotone way of speaking.

"We got work to do I think we should get back to it."

Translations

Sithis salva nos, si primo invenit eum- Sithis save us if it finds him first

Sed si duo non desinebat animo tuo da-Now if you two don't mind ending your da-

[Deleted]

"Why would I want you to shoot me?"

"Because the guy controlling us pissed off the guy controlling Poe. It'd just mean his other two guys would be left. Poor guy has a serious case of split personality I suspect."

Shadow watches as he watches his comrade lick his lips and all his other gestures.

"Sinister-say-whata-what? Could you, for the love of God just speak English? You sound like a murmuring baby when you speak whatever it is you speak at times. It's annoying."

"For once I have to agree. I think Edgar Allen Poe over there is trying to write his new book and confuse the rest of us."

"Nice to know you agree with me now. By the way, did you enjoy the cookie?"

"I did. Almost as much as I'd enjoy miss Crusader there for one night."

"No, you can't. She belongs to Poe... At least..."

Shadow walks up to Poe, wrapping his arm around his neck. The Merc with the Mouth, in a very obvious nature, points to Mason.

"So... You ask her out yet? Boobies over there I mean... Sorry, my handler is a little bit stupid... The girl. *points to Mason* over there... With the boobs? You see her? Yeah, her. You ask her yet?"

[Poe/Fide/Scrap]

The brooding assassin turns to the Shadow with a raised eyebrow and tries his best not to seem interested in the female party with them.

"What are you talking about Brother?"

The way the last word comes out is more like a growl as if he is trying to say 'silence' without screaming it. The Shadow wraps an arm around Poe's shoulder.

"Did you ask her out yet? Did you? Did you? did you?"

"He's going to punch you in the face if you keep that up."

"Dude he's not going to punch me in the face. We're buddies and besides we're on the same side."

"Fine correction his handler is going to kick me in the nuts for making you go into this conversation..."

"He likes to handle his what now?"

"Oy... Just give me another cookie."

The ninja from Iga shoves another chocolate chip cookie under his mask and gobbles it down. Poe watches the conversation happen like a kid watching a horror movie for the first time.

"Brother please refrain from arguing with yourself in public... For Sithis sake."

"See I told you If he was going to hit me he'd already have done it.

"Steve is probably too busy laughing his ass off as he types this up.

"Who's stiff from hyping what up?"

'Oh Sithis save me,' Poe thinks to himself as he listens to the odd conversation from the bi polar ninja. He lets out a low groan as he palms his face.

"Anyway have you asked boobs out yet or not? Have you huh? Huh? Have you?"

"For Sithis sake! Ok Brother I am going to say this once and slowly so be sure to listen closely and drown out that other you... You are a ninja... A member of The Brotherhood and you need to behave as such... Stop with this nonsense... Just because you are based of a comic book hero... Who by the way was probably created by a loser who lives in his grandmother's basement... You are NOT a superhero... You are not a hero to every pimple faced kid who was ignored by a pretty girl... You are not the hero of any loser who ever bought a losing lottery ticket... Sithis willing you will stop acting like little more than what some loser would create in a video game!"

Poe clears his throat and attempts to regain his composure.